redacted

i will try to recall how we met

how we snuck from our rooms 

to meet on the grassy lawn, 

run out into the night  

it was one of those evenings

when the moon watches firmly over its subjects 

the ocean washes up

spreading life all over the sand

you knew the line to a poem i once read 

we peer into the future and see you happy and we

hope it is a sign that we will be happy too

we wander through empty hallways and staircases

peer through holes in the ceiling

let the wind brush our thoughts away

close our differences, weave our senses into one

do you think we will ever meet again? 

you know, i used to say i would never be with another writer

you wonder how a place so beautiful grows boring with time

hope is a beautiful thing, because it keeps you alive

but it’s internal 

i want your entirety

and i will never want anything less

we walk until dawn 

you sleep on the beach all week, never even wash your hair 

buy my coffee in the morning, 

stay with me until i had to go

i think of you when i become what i said i never would, 

when i remember what you were like 

i dream that we’re together, 

you find me on some distant shore

your hair’s a bit longer, you tug on dark roots as we walk

the road is empty, and it’s cold 

a car passes by every hour

i’ve forgotten that you're tall 

and you're real 

and that when i’m with you, i feel okay

i ache to write down every line you say to me,

knot the letters together in a bow, 

and toss them to the ocean

so i can drown along with them